Thursday, September 23, 2010

Love & Photographs

photo taken from Love & Photographs
I have a new button on my sidebar for Love & Photographs!!  I discovered this shop where you can find clothing from Anthropologie at extremely discounted prices!!  I'm talking super cheap!  They are used clothes, but pshhh.....they are still cute right? She sells other brands as well!  You should totally check it out!

Mommy Monster

Emilee has entered a new phase.....a phase of perpetual fear.  Her dreams are vivid and haunting.  Some of them have lingered until real world becomes confused with dream world, and there is no convincing her that everything is going to be alright.

Sure there are plenty of things in the real world that could hurt her, but one so little shouldn't be followed around by worry and fright.  It breaks my heart to watch her lay in her bed trying to be brave with her blanket over her head as not to catch a glimpse of the scary monkey in the closet!! 

I can't help but wonder if all of this fear happens to correlate to my new phase.....the scary grumpy mommy phase.  

During the last few weeks I have had moments and even days that cause me to cringe and hang my head in shame.  Where there should be love, patience and warmth, I have shown up with screeching disapproval and reprimands.  I have snapped at the littlest of things.  I have said no, when I should have, and could have said yes and I have created a home of chaos and disorder with my selfish grumpiness!  No wonder my daughter stays awake at night worrying about all of the most frightening things her little imagination can conjure.  How can I expect her to believe my assurances when they are bumped up against my own fears and anxiety?

Last night after I tucked my precious babies into bed, I slipped away to my own bed and looked for comfort and reassurance in the only place I know how.  I prayed for strength and peace to flow into my heart.  I want to lead my daughters by example, and matching temper tantrum with temper tantrum isn't what I was intending.

I found my strength and peace in these words:

"Children rise higher when they are treated with respect.  Use courteous and respectful language when you talk with one another.  We have always had pretty clear expectations in our home about using respectful language.  One day our little granddaughter had been playing with a friend and came home quite upset about something the friend had said.  Her mother asked her what it was.  She responded, "Well, it's such a bad word I can't say it, but it was shut (point upward)!"
A world famous psychologist, Bruno Bettleheim, said at the age of eighty-four, "You can't teach children to be good.  The best you can do for your child is to live a good life yourself.  What a parent knows and believes, the child will lean on."
You don't teach a child not to hit by hitting.  We cannot expect to be respected if we treat others in demeaning ways."

Marjorie Pay Hinkley 
(one of my favorite ladies)

I know moms get grumpy.....I get that!  I know we work hard and tend to whining children and clean up messes all day.  Sometimes it can be wearing and frustrating!  What I am NOT okay with is seeing myself behave as anything but loving. 

I must say I'm relieved I woke up today!  That I am still breathing!  I'm taking it as a good sign that the Lord still trusts me to love these girls and do better today!

Monday, September 13, 2010

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!

Adeline swinging at her birthday pinata

This morning I held Adeline in my arms and looked into her bright eyes. They beamed up at me and without warning she planted a perfect little kiss right on my lips. We hugged and smiled at each other. I told her it was her birthday, that one year ago today she entered the world and expanded my heart. I thanked her for being a part of my life!

Emmy and I sang her a rousing "Happy Birthday", and she smiled.

I love this tiny girl. I love her voice, her laugh, and her warm and generous heart!! She is so amazingly affectionate. She cuddles and hugs and kisses all on her own accord. It is absolutely heart melting. Is there any more perfect gift than the love of a chubby cheeked baby?!!

Adeline, your sunshine warms me through and through! My lips are worn thin from the accumulated hours of kissing your glorious cheeks. I adore you, and am inspired by your sense of discovery and your determination to climb higher and higher!!

You don't speak much yet, but I sense in you a contentment that you didn't have in your early months. I do believe that you are fully embracing your new adventurous life. I know you feel, safe and loved. I can feel it when I hold you.

Today, the rest of the world goes on as usual, but I will quietly celebrate your perfect little life and all you are becoming!!! Being your mother is a dream come true!

I love you tiny!

Friday, September 10, 2010

Beautiful Crochet

Doesn't this image make you want to take up crocheting?

I would love to see colorful afghans piled up around the house, cheerfully warming little bodies and adding color to the drab days of winter!

I guess I'd better pick up some yarn and dig out my crocheting needles!!

*image found here

Crisp, Cool, Warm and Fuzzy

Summer swept through quietly, rosy cheeked and happy! Somehow we only managed one pool party on the lawn. It's kind of sad and very disappointing for my little Em, but we did manage a few sprinkler runs and camping trips. It has been a good summer.

For weeks now I have been waiting for the first of September to drop my cinnamon apple into the Scentsy warmer. For me part of the appeal of Fall is the smell of Fall. I love the warm pumpkin breads and apple cobblers. The homey aroma of clove, cinnamon and nutmeg! I LOVE Autumn. The colors are glorious, fiery and warm.

It's so lovely walking under the warm sun with the crisp cool air on your face. For me this approaching season conjures up everything cozy and nostalgic. It signifies the "getting back to business" time of year, with schools back in session and summer laziness all wrapped up in a pretty package and placed back up on the shelf. The exciting part is that another pretty package gets to come down. I look forward to the sweaters and socks again, and the familiar smell and warmth of our little wood burning stove.

I only wish this time of year lingered a little longer!