Flowery & Wise

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I am writing a book!  This is huge for me, and scary, and satisfying, and intimidating, and a million other things. 

It has become evident that I am addicted to flowery words.  This is a problem because flowery writing has to be tamed when writing a REAL book.  It might be okay for my own personal journal, or maybe even this little blog, but the printed word, bound and ready for purchase....has to be more grounded.

I am a dreamer!  Just last night I was told that I live with my head in the clouds.  I suppose it is true, but amid all of my "daydreamy-ness", I actually know a thing or two about life.  A thing or two worth sharing, and my hope is that the truth and wisdom I carry in my deepest depths will tame my flowery heart, and what will eventually come out of this work, will be a little piece of me....the perfect blend of rose colored wisdom.

A Life Near The Sea

Howard and Haroldene live near the sea, in a perfectly charming blue house with blue walls, and even a blue hard wood floor.  Surrounded by rose bushes and knick-knacks and walls lined with books and photo albums, you can't help but feel the history and stories that make up their beautiful life together.

 Their faithful companion, Rosie, scurries about under foot and excitedly greets us with heavy panting and rough doggy kisses.  

My girls are in heaven.....and so am I.  

It is our first time meeting this part of our family.  Tyler has told us of their wit and chemistry......how together they make the perfect couple.....the perfect grandparents.  The type who dote on you and make you feel like the most lovable creature in all the world.  Being there in their presence only proved him right.

Emilee collapses in slumber on a nearby chair, completely worn out from our travels and adventures, as the rest of us enjoy a slide show.  You know, with the slide projector and one of those old white screens.  It is absolutely perfect!  Each slide that flashes by paints the picture of grandma's dream.   

To live in a look out tower on a mountain top.  

As the story goes, she took a job in her fifties, for the forest service at a forest fire look out.  She and her dog Maggie lived on the mountain every summer for ten years, and grandpa would visit on the weekends.  Grandma was good at her job, and living a dream made everything magic.  A tiny cabin perched on a cliff, equipped with wood burning stove, the perfect mountain view and dotted with vases full of wild flowers.  It was her home....and she made it her own.  Everything was more beautiful because she had been there.

I smiled, listening to them talk over each other, hastily trying to include every detail, then grandpa would apologize for interrupting and both would sit in silence for a moment waiting for the other to finish the story. They were so proud of their life together and the things they accomplished were important to us, because they were important to them.

Their stories made me cherish my own.  It made me realize that my life is the story I will someday tell my grandchildren and great grandchildren.  

Grandma's health has been failing in the last few years, and as a result Grandpa has taken over all of the household duties.  Watching him take care of his sweetheart was so touching.  It was evident that their years together had forged a love for her in his heart that was real and deep and long suffering.  On the first night we were there I came into the kitchen to dish some dinner up for Tyler.  Grandpa quickly thanked me for "taking care of my guy", reminding me that when we love someone we must serve them.  His example taught me this more than anything he could ever say.

As we backed out of their drive way on a Friday afternoon, the image of them sending us on our way, filled me up completely.  I knew I had been given something valuable.  I had been tutored in love and encouraged by a wisdom greater than my own.  I think I saw more clearly the value of family and how we are all in this together!

Grandma and Grandpa,

I loved sharing a small part of your life near the sea!  Everything about our visit inspired love and restored the magic of adventure in me!  You showed me what it means to be generous and inspired me to take care of everyone and everything around me.  Thank you for all of the gifts you give.

I'll love you forever and ever.

~Michelle

The Lovely Letter

I want a pen-pal!

I've been obsessed with the idea lately and I'm on a quest to revive the forgotten charm of letter writing.  

I really want to buy pretty note cards and stationary and send little bits of my heart out to an unfamiliar place.  I want to  learn about someone interesting, with good ideas and a life that is different and new!

On the other hand........I want to reconnect with familiar places.

My cousin's and I used to write letters to each other growing up.  Unfortunately I have been so negligent when it comes to keeping in touch with people I love and care about.  

I recently went through a bunch of old boxes and found stacks and stacks of old letters from my childhood.  I only kept a handful of them, as there were too many to read and store.  In this process though, a little fire was lit inside and the need to share love and words has been swirling around inside me ever since.

There is something so warm and nostalgic about a handwritten letter, and it is always fun to have something real and personal waiting for you in the mailbox.

I think it would be fun to start a club where paper, pen, envelopes and stamps carry words of love and encouragement to people all over the world. Everyone who joins would be paired up with another member and for a whole year you would send and receive a monthly letter.  It could be about anything, but it would need to be positive and inspiring.....something to look forward to receiving!

I know writing letters isn't a new idea, but It feels fresh and exciting, considering the fact that everything is digital nowadays!

If anyone can match me up with a pen-pal....please let me know!

Love,

Me

Becoming a Queen

In recent months, I have been fascinated with the idea of becoming. By that, I mean the idea of changing and evolving into my full potential. Into something greater than I currently am.

I have felt a need to find out what I am really doing here. It is my belief that we came from another existence where we were given a choice to come to earth. I believe that promises were made there and assignments were given. We interacted with God. I believe we are His children, and as His children we hold divinity that is beyond our comprehension. Being here on earth is part of a grand plan, the purpose of which, is to unite all of us as one eternal family and allow us the choice to return to our Father in Heaven. I have lived my entire life with these understandings, but I realize that just knowing something doesn’t mean I am really living up to my potential and purpose.

What is it then, that must be done for me to become who and what I am meant to be? Is it more about changing myself, or is it more about remembering myself? Most likely some of both.

Because these things have been on my mind a lot lately, it feels like I am at the beginning of my journey, but if I look back at my life thus far, I find that I have been on the journey all along. Becoming is simply about choices. Every choice we make sends us down the path of becoming. The question is what am I becoming?

Am I on the path to my full potential? Or am I wandering around, lost, confused, and focused on things that are nothing more than distractions.

I want to become who I am supposed to be. That is what I have decided for myself, and hopefully my choices will reflect that more often than not. Fulfilling my purpose is a very personal and sacred path, but I am all about working together to make things happen, and I’d like to include anyone and everyone who would like to help. In return I’d like to help anyone I can.

Because of all of this I have started a new blog Becoming a Queen. Through this blog I am going to share what I feel are crucial elements in this process. My hope is that others will help and contribute. I would love to interview others who are on this same quest, and who may have insight that will help me on my journey. I am excited to learn and...become.

Courage my Love

Adeline is our apprehensive child. She is a homebody, and when I say homebody I mean she likes to be held tightly against her mother's body, and most of the time nobody else will do.

She ponders daily on many serious subjects, and I like to imagine that she is visualizing all of the great things she will accomplish during her life.

Having a second child has caused me to realize that indeed all children are different. They arrive with different personalities, strengths, and missions to fulfill. I really think that coming to earth was harder for Adeline than it was for Emilee. I try to create a sense of security and safety around her....I desire to instill the confidence she will need to branch out and embrace her purpose here on earth! It is all so wonderful and exciting!

Addy, I love it when daddy brings you to our bed in the mornings. You wiggle and smile as we lay tummy to tummy......mommy and baby. You reach for my face, lay your sweet head on my chest and suck on your tiny thumb. You gaze at me with those beautiful blues and lift me out of my morning slump. I love that about you.

Be strong my sweet Adeline. Life is yours...it is now. Soak it in, wrap your soft little arms around it and take courage my love. All things are possible for you......my beautiful baby girl.

Good Reminder

My friend Heather had this posted on her blog today. It is a timely reminder for me. I so easily get confused and forgetful about what I should REALLY be doing. Hopefully it will help you to read it as well!

"When we put God first, all other things fall into their proper place or drop out of our lives. Our love of the Lord will govern the claims for our affection, the demands of our time, the interests we pursue, and the order of our priorities."

-President Ezra Taft Benson